Spilled glowsticks

Back from MFF :D I am TIRED. We got home at 10 last night after leaving at noonish Monday >.>;; stopped off in CT on the way home, crashed on D's futon, and saw the new twilight movie. which...is terrible. No surprises there.

Anyways, con was fun and profitable. Wish I had spent a little more time getting to be with friends I don't see often, but I really needed the money for moving =[ Had a ton of fun hanging out with Rensis and being the dumbest people we could be XP SMELL THE ELEVATOR DENIAL.

People were nice, sales were good, drive....wasn't terrible >.>; tho ark is right, we may need to bring some sort of sedative on the next trip so I just curl up in the back and sleep instead of panicking because someone else is driving ;.; i am such a spaz lol

Moving.

December 1st.

<3

I think i broke something in my foot ;=;

ow.

I hope I didn't, I"m really not supposed to call out of work, but I can barely stand, let alone spend a day on register, or run around the store. think I may go to the doctors if it still feels this bad tomorrow ;=;

In other news...ran into an old friend today. was interesting because I'd been thinking about her earlier. She seems to have...gotten less retarded as of late. I kind of hope we start talking again. Every so often we talk, and I realize how much I miss the comfort of knowing someone for so long. =/

=.= god i just... need to fucking punch my mother. in the teeth. with a hammer.

So, there's this /rule/ in my house. Ark and I are not allowed to be upstairs, in the same room together after 10 pm. This is dumb, but manageable.

Usually, we go downstairs and watch movies on my laptop in the kitchen. it's relatively private for a house with an open floor plan, so it's alright. As long as there isn't too much extraneous noise, anyways. However, our living room tends to...magnify sound. Cathedral ceiling, they do that. Anyways, into tonight.

We head down at about 10:30 to continue watching a movie. I shut off the TV, as it's obvious no one is watching it, my brother's off wandering the house, mum and jon are in the basement. Not doing nay harm to anyone if I shut it off. As soon as I do this, however, my mother walks in. Here is our conversation:

Mum: Did your brother go to bed? I think he was watching that ( bear in mind, my brother is always "watching that". if he didn't have to go to school, he'd never shut the TV off. My mother was proud of him when he managed to simply identify that he watched different shows. not kidding )
Me: Well, he's upstairs doing something. So I guess he's done.
Mum: No, I sent him upstairs for something. He has priority.
Me: What? Why?
Mum: Because you have your own room. Your space. Go there if it's too loud in here.
Me: But...he has his own room... 2 of them... why can't he watch TV there? ( yes he has 2 rooms. Yes, he has cable in both of them. and 2 tv's. Neither of them had cable when we moved in. Are you guys getting the picture yet? )
Mum: He has priority. He was watching TV.
Me: Well then can Ark and I go hang out in my room?
Mum: He can go to his room, you can go to yours.
Me: -blank stare of confusion and hate-
Mum: Oh, what? Are you going to tell me I SUCK now? Are you going to tell me I SUCK like you tell everyone you talk to I SUCK?
Me: -blank stare of more hate-

:| I am...so full of hate. God. this bitch. needs to grow a fucking brain.

EDIT. more stupid. Remember the canobie tickets? That she wanted for free? Agreed to give me $10 for them. and then. took them. Guess who didn't get $10. >:|

well fuuuuuccccccckkkkk yoooooooooooouuuuuuu livejournal. >[ I posted last night. with a meme.

it is now nowhere to be found. FULL OF THE GAY.

anwyays. I have had all of today off. I just realized it's nearly 5, I'm still in my pajamas, and I have done nothing.

nothing. at. all.

=/

goodbye, plans for my day off.

maybe I'll get to them tomorrow. which I believe... I also have off, assuming my schedule was fixed ( My availability! IT IS SET FOR A REASON! >[ ) I...repeatedly get scheduled wrong. which is annoying. had to give up an 8.5 hour shift. because. it was 12-8:30 and I have class at 5 >| like...is it really that hard?

baugh i suppose at least I'm loved enough to get hours. wish they would have just hired me at full time if I'm going to work 30 hours a week =| benefits prz?

SORRY GUYS I AM JUST A LITTLE BALL OF RAGE. ;=;

I wish I knew more...crafty people in my area =/ I really like...want to work with someone else. I lose interest in working on my own, and it tends to get boring. I feel like working on my own keeps me trapped in my own ideas, without a whole lot of outside interference too. x-x; I don't so much want a business partner as a friend whose into the same sort of crafty things. =[ y'know, bounce ideas off each other, have company in something that I'd generally consider a VERY solitary activity. ( I dislike people who AREN'T working to sit at my work table. It pisses me off unimaginably. )

dunno. the only people I know who are really into suit making or furry crafty things life much to far away, have given it up, or are the kiddies I went to high school with who are severely dumb =[

TL;DR...

anyone want to come over and make fursuits with me? xP

I am sick.

at least...i think i'm sick. :[ this is...unpleasant. However...lucky...in that I got to spend an extra like...4 hours at home that otherwise would have been spent counting peoples change and listening to coupon rants. Also the realization that I have some really nice coworkers was pretty cool <3

But yeah the whole story is I came quite close to tossing my cookies and passing out on my register. Luckily... I just kinda grabbed my manager and was like ;-; imma go sit down kay? I don't feel so good and the room just went all fuzzy on me. and her response was Wha.. oh my god you look pale. Are you okay? at which point I crawled into our back room, curled up at the table, and was handed a plastic bag to puke in and told to call for a ride home by one of my supervisors. which was cool since I was expecting to get chewed out for being lazy or something ;=;

so now I feel...somewhat sicky but not horrible. prolly the milkshake I had >.<; but...ark knocked one of my teeth lose so I've been trying to keep cold things in my face.

LOL I AM A MESS OF BROKEN TODAY.

wth is up with my bank account ;====; ugggghhhh td you are usually so cool and now you are just suuuck. I deposited my checks likeeeee saturday morning. as cash. which should be instant.

It's now monday, and i still haven't gotten my check.

also my $100 payment for my laptop isn't through. I don't think =.= AUUUGHHHHH. wtf.

also i am sick =/

so apparently.....i am a gigantic, inhuman jerk. According to my mother.

Why?

Because I don't want to give her the free stuff I get from work. =.= I got tickets to the haunted house/amusement park I worked for all summer ( worth about $50 ). I found this out... about 10 minutes after we had paid $40 for our tickets to get in today. So Ark and I were like...well gay, we don't want to come a second time. Well maybe we can sell em to spewface, considering she'd have to pay $40 to get in too, and we'd like some of the money we paid back since we were SUPPOSED to get free tickets =/ so i got home and offered them to my mom, who was thrilled until she realized I wanted $10 or so for them.

And... is now... bitching to her boyfriend about what an ungrateful little shit I am. Because... apparently the fact that I bought a new cell phone and laptop means I make big bucks and shouldn't want to take money from her :P Because, yes, my saving money from my minimum wage job is WAAAAYYYY more than your $200k a year. I'm such a jerk.

I kinda just want to toss the tickets out of spite or like... give them to someone I work with. :P

blarf. just another in a string of stupid from my mother over the last few days :/ like, her freaking out because I'm having trouble in school and want to drop one of my classes ( online classes suuuuck >.<; ). Which lead to an argument about an insignificant detail point, and her completely ignoring the gist of what I said to her =.= buh. I just... can't deal with stupid people.

I realized while browsing FA in the school's cafe today...

I'm one of those creeps who looks at porn in public. |:

Has been a very awesome couple of days [: spent the weekend hanging out with awesome people doing awesome things <3 Stayed with underthebed and went to a ren faire! Which was small, but getting dressed up and going with fun people made it very awesome <3 also indoor cookout ftw!

going back to work today was actually rather awesome! :D Jan hooked me up with the people making costumes for the halloween event, and so I spent the day off in my own little corner working on sewing projects! :D I made all sorts of neat things, and felt very at home. Apparently, i did a really awesome job too, which is cool since I was worried I would have far too messy stitching ;==; i guess not tho.

i think i may work on suit stuff tonight, and see if i can try a new moving jaw method o=

ugh.

I have class in....9 hours. and I have yet to do my homework. Art homework, mind. so obviously, I am a huge failure. I can't even motivate myself for something i want to do.

let alone the shitty stuff like an english class that's %90 online. e-e;

I wish... I were only taking like 2 classes. I am very stressed, and very unmotivated. this is a bad combination.

other than that.... work hasn't been bad lately. still get the horrible anxiety going in, but it gets better faster now that I'm... well, not making friends I suppose, but learning people's names and becoming more familiar with them. :|

yes, fuck off, I am intensely antisocial.

Also we watched porn in Denny's. win.

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

;==;

i lost my phone. UGH. I HAD IT. WHEN. I LEFT THE HOUSE. and i think i left it in the car.

BUT. I'm sitting at barnes and noble, ark's at work, and I have to walk to michael's before my shift. BUT I HAVE NO PHONE. SO. NO CLOCK. and my laptop battery's only good for another hour and 40 minutes. Which means it's good til....1 ish.

I don't work til 3. ugh. so i suppose i'll leave at 1 and stop at kmart and pick up a watch and a padlock. :[ even tho i have yet to get a locker at work. I'll just...i dunno. steal an empty one.

=/ today is insisting on being stressful. -sighs- I want to go home and go back to sleep.


also i have no sadface icon that is appropriate for somewhat melancholy posts. I have a "somewhat annoyed" face and a "BAAAAAAWWWWWW" face. but nothing in between =[

MAN

I WISH MY INTERNET DID NOT SUCK |:<

we pay for fucking FIBER OPTICS. WHY IS IT GOING TO TAKE 4 DAYS FOR A SEASON OF HOUSE TO DOWNLOAD?

this is irritating. And because it is not MY internet, it is my mother's, NOTHING WILL EVER GET DONE ABOUT IT. >===> goddammnit. I WANT LIGHTNING SPEED DOWNLOADS AGAIN

seriously the last time I torrented a season of House, it took less than 9 hours. NOW IT WILL TAKE 3 DAYS. wtf. WHY IS THIS SHIT SO HARD TO FIX! WHY!

Fuck you unlimited fiber optic bandwidth, you are a LIE.


really i just needed an excuse to use my rage icon, and I want to whine about stupid shit that I suppose doesn't matter but annoys me anyways ;==; work was crazy today. People are mean, and I hate it. Also...one of our supervisors ( who is like.... cool but a dick? ) almost made this chick Amanda cry, which is TOTALLY obnoxious, since she is wicked nice D:<

also, wtf is with the staying open late for a sale. NO BODY COMES IN AFTER CLOSING HOURS, WHY DO YOU BOTHER. ;==;

i think i might be sick too. BLLLLLAAAARRRRGGHHHHHHHHHHHHGHHHH.

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/2724960

stuff like this makes me want to give up drawing and stop trying forever. ;==; it's so amazing... seeing things like this on FA makes me ashamed that I call what I do art.

ewifiihkljsadklads

UHG. WORK SUCK. SO. MUCH. WORK SUCK.

;===;

I....hate working with Jeff. he makes me nervous and uncomfortable and stressed. even worse, he KEPT FUCKING WATCHING ME.

like... I was trying to help a customer find something. by...telling them what aisle it was in. which....i assumed was a perfectly normal and useful way to help people. as soon as they walked away he comes up to me and says "I dunno WHO told you otherwise, but in this store, we WALK the customer to their aisle." >| UUUGHHHHHHHH YOU KNOW WHAT DUDE FUCK OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF.


and then... i got hauled onto register, which, you know, whatever. happens. :P but I needed to call him over ( ACTUALLY JERK FACE I CALLED FOR JESS. ;==; why did you come over anyways, ugh ) to do a return. and he...idk. gave me shit for that. UH DUDE I NEEDED YOUR KEY REGARDLESS OF MY OWN SKILL. FUCK OFF. and he like....just sat there and watched me and criticized my ability to talk to a customer. like UM YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO GET HIS ZIP CODE and I was like... uh. i know, i got it during his first return, he had 2. and then he was like UM YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD HIM HE GOT A COUPON. SELL BETTER! and I was like...ALREADY DID UGH.

and of course, closing he just sucks at. everyone else gets us out by 9:20. He gets us out at QUARTER OF 10. UUUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Everyone else is super nice thooooo [: yeeey. <3

WHOOOOOO

started classes today =3 so far, best day I've had in a while. Was pleasantly surprised with an art class first thing this morning, drawing 1. People in it seem friendly, and the teacher's nice <3 it's going to be fun, I think! twice a week, too, YAY :D we got to play with charcoal today! I have never used charcoal, so it was quite an experience! made...a mess. >3<; khaki pants and bag definitely lose in a fight with charcoal fingers.

Made friends! :D some people I met at AB go to NECC too, and I hung out with them in between my classes and they introduced m to their group <3 we all hung out and watched youtube videos! And Night helped me find my classes and get my books and ID because she is all kinds of awesome <3 mmm. having such a good time. At the other campus atm, because I have a class here. x= it is...not so nice. but w/e. Only have to be here at night so i guess it's okay. Definitely going to take the later shuttle next week i think =P I don't think i like hanging out here for 2 hours alone.

SO thrilled for tomorrow! I get to go ART SUPPLY SHOPPING =D eeeeeeeeek. so much fun.

-rolls around- yaaaay good day. [:

:D set up my "new" mood theme finally!

it was made for a trade maybe....2 years ago? o-o; finally... had the time to set it up! <3 it's super cute!

Also 2 more icons added to my list :D the current one is by starcharmer and the other is a RAGE face by skulldog :D yaaaaaayyyy arts.

[:

i went to walmart today to get a new sticker maker and needed grocery things. came home with sticker maker and assorted grocery things and......


A CUPCAKE.


<3 nom. -goes off to make stickers and nibble on her cupcake-

ALSOALSOALSO. if anyone wants a sticker, comment with your reference [: i need examples! I'm going to be selling them at FF!

EDIT:



STICKERS STICKERS STICKERS

man.

i haven't even gone to work yet and i already feel so stressed and depressed and anxious that i want to cry.

today will not be a good day ;=; -whimpers-